KYN, 51, NEW HAVEN, CT
Gender Projected
How old are you, and where are you from?
51. Texas and California.
How would you identify your gender?
Sexually I am a woman, but intellectually, I feel that it is more complicated.
Why did you want to be involved in the project?
The project is timely because we are at a crux right now where society is learning what gender is and isn’t.
What presentation made you feel least like yourself? Why?
The drag queen presentation felt least like me because the level of femininity of the clothes was not something I had done in a while. I felt like I was pretending.
Was there a gender identity/presentation that you wanted to try but hadn’t before this project but didn’t have the chance to do until this project?
The drag queen. Actually, I had never considered it before, but when I thought about doing the project, I thought about [this presentation] immediately. I know a lot of people who do drag, and I thought it would be fun to stand in their shoes for a little while.
How do you generally present?
I don’t think about gender when I dress--I just wear what is comfortable.
Did you gain any perspective on gender identity/expression in yourself during the project?
Yes. I thought I would feel really uncomfortable in the feminine clothing, but when I started wearing makeup, I felt more comfortable and able to express myself. I was able to be an extrovert in an acceptable framework.
Did you gain any perspective on gender identity/expression in other people during the project?
Yes. It has been enlightening to see that gender identity is much broader than the little boxes that most of society still feels a tendency to put it in.
Does the ease of a certain gender identity make you dress that way more?
I dress in a way that is easy. For the most part, I don’t think of myself in a gendered way. I think of myself as a person, and I resent it when I am forced to choose.
Do you dress a different way when you are trying to appeal to a different audience?
I only dress feminine when I have to--there are times when I have to in order to get what I want.
In your life, was there another time you explored/experimented with gender identity/expression? If so, what type of experience was it?
I wouldn’t say that I have experimented, but I have always felt that I identify more with men. I feel more powerful when I have a male identity intellectually.
What keeps you from dressing the way you feel most comfortable if anything?
I like dressing practically and comfortably. However, because I live in an affluent town, that kind of dressing is not always seen as acceptable for women.
What do you feel is the aspect of your identity that you think about the most? How do you feel that this part of your identity was represented and/or misrepresented in this project?
I think about my intellect the most, and I believe it was misrepresented in the project because when it comes to public opinion, blonde women are often seen as unintelligent. This is true in a lot of the circles that I have been in - business, academia, etc.
What parts of you are hidden in the photographs?
I know that people will see someone older when they see the photographs, but I don’t feel that old.
After seeing the photographs of yourself, what emotions do you feel? Do they look how you expected? Different than you expected?
The one in the suit really shocks me. The photographs of me in this presentation remind me of my male relatives from when I was a little kid in Texas. It is very spooky.