NERI, 13, NEW HAVEN, CT
Gender Projected
What pronouns do you use?
He/him
Where are you from? Where do you live now? Have you ever lived anywhere else?
I’m from Bologna, Italy, and I have lived in New Haven since August 2014 because my mom is doing a PhD at Yale.
How old are you?
13
How did find out about the project and why did you want to be involved?
Our teacher talked about it, and I was interested because you usually don’t see a lot of stuff like this.
Is there anything you would want to do before finishing the project?
Our teacher showed us pictures of girls dressed as boys and boys dressed as girls, and I really wanted to try that--put a dress on with makeup.
How do you generally present?
I am usually a male, but I have no problem if people think I’m a girl. I used to have long hair, and people would be confused, call me she, and say “you’re a girl.” But I had no problem, I just told them I am not a girl.
How would you identify your gender?
I don’t know, I guess a male.
Did you tell anyone you were participating and if so what was their response? Will you tell anyone? What do you expect their response to be?
I just told my family. They were ok with it, and my mom said have fun.
Have you / did you / will you take pictures from this project and post them on places outside of this project? If so, which ones and why?
Oh yeah! I will show them to my grandparents, my uncles, everyone.
In your life, was there another time you explored/experimented with gender identity/expression? If so, what type of experience was it?
When I had to wear a swim cap at the pool, people would confuse me for a girl, even with a male bathing suit.
What keeps you from presenting the way you feel most comfortable if anything?
I wear what I want, and if people say something about it, that’s their opinion. At the beginning of moving to America I had problems with language, and I didn’t know how to behave in this part of the world. I still don’t know sometimes. Why can’t I sing when I’m walking down the street?
Where/when is a time in your life you have felt uncomfortable for some aspect of your identity? Why?
When I came to the USA I felt like an outsider, and I was scared of doing everything wrong.
Was there anything about the project that made you feel uncomfortable? If so, how did you feel and why?
Wearing the bra made me feel really strange because it was so hard to put on and so hard to take off.
What presentation made you feel least like yourself? Why?
Definitely the one where I dressed up with saggy pants, a large shirt, and a baseball hat--I would never do something like that. The one where I dressed like a model with high heels and all the makeup was weird but better that than the other one.
What presentation would you be afraid to wear on the street where you live now (if any?) Why?
Personally none. Some people may be uncomfortable but I dress how I want and if other people don’t like that than that’s their problem.
What was something you did during this project that you had never done before? How did that make you feel?
I never put on any makeup, and it was strange. Also the high heels they were the worst-- it was so hard to walk with those things attached to my feet.
Did you gain any perspective on gender identity/expression in yourself during the project?
After the project, I felt like I could be whatever I wanted to be.