BRANDI, 18, SOUTHBURY, CT
Gender Projected
Where are you from, and how old are you?
I’m from Bristol, CT, and I live in Southbury, CT. I am 18.
How would you identify your gender?
Female.
What pronouns do you use?
She/her/hers.
What does being genderfluid mean to you?
I mostly identify as a girl. I don’t dress up like a boy because I identify as a boy--I feel more confident because there is less pressure when I dress like a boy.
How did find out about the project and why did you want to be involved?
Since I identify as genderfluid, I had questions about which roller derby league I was supposed to be in. I wanted to be involved in the project because one of the roller derby people recommended it to me after having that conversation.
What presentation made you feel most like yourself? Why?
The goth one. I identify with the whole punk scene a lot, but that makes bad impressions on people a lot of the time, so I don’t often get the chance to dress up like that.
What presentation made you feel least like yourself? Why?
The one where I had the boy makeup with the girl clothes. Because normally I either do one or the other.
Did you gain any perspective on gender identity/expression in other people during the project?
It was really cool seeing the transformations in other people and seeing how excited they were when they saw versions of themselves that they don’t usually get to see.
Do you dress a different way when you are trying to appeal to a different audience?
Yeah. When I am going to school at Paul Mitchell, I want to appear more professional because I believe the closer you are to society’s “normal,” the more people trust you.
In your life, was there another time you explored/experimented with gender identity/expression? If so, what type of experience was it?
Yeah. I posted a couple pictures on Instagram of me doing genderbending, and no one said anything bad about it. Some of my friends said I made a cute guy.
How does your physical fitness or body weight play into your gender identity/expression?
I am petite, so that is good on girly days. But also I have kind of broad shoulders, so that is good for days when I am feeling more masculine--I can wear tank tops.
What keeps you from presenting the way you feel most comfortable if anything?
Fear of judgment in general. Because I am always scared of the idea of missing the opportunity to make friends. So if I feel like dressing a certain way is going to make people uncomfortable and not want to get to know me then I won’t.
How do your gender identity and sexuality intersect, if at all?
People ask me sometimes if I am bisexual or pansexual and I really don’t know what to say to that. I don’t really have a term for it. I always just say, “I love the person not the parts.” It might have something to do with my gender identity.