LUIS, 27, NEW HAVEN, CT
Gender Projected
Where are you from? Where do you live now? Have you ever lived anywhere else?
Ponce, Puerto Rico; New Haven, CT; and I lived in Florida for 2 months when I was 19.
How old are you?
27
How would you identify your gender?
I guess male because I have a penis. But I feel like I am just me.
Why did you want to be involved in the project?
The project is about genderbending, being who you are, and not being scared to express yourself whether through clothing, hair, makeup, or performance.
What presentation made you feel least like yourself? Why?
I feel like they were all a part of me, but if I had to choose it would be the one with the heels and makeup because I don’t dress like that every day.
What presentation would you be afraid to wear on the street where you live now (if any?) Why?
I wouldn’t be afraid to wear any. I am okay with it, but there are people around me that are not okay with it. But that only makes me do it more.
What presentation would you be afraid to wear on the street in your hometown or around your family? (if any?) Why?
Probably the one with makeup and heels. I remember my brother once said, “If I ever see any of my brothers in drag in person, I would slap them in the face.” I am not scared to do it because I kind of want to to see what he would do, but I don’t want to create any problems at the same time.
How do you generally present?
Sweatpants. Because I am always teaching dance and running around. I am most comfortable in sweatpants, but I love dressing up. But I feel like even in sweatpants I still express myself. I wear wacky socks or pink sweatpants. I’m not ashamed to be colorful with my clothing.
Did you gain any perspective on gender identity/expression in yourself during the project?
Yeah. There were some questions that I never thought about asking myself. Now that they are in my head, like the whole gender/sexuality thing, I am more aware of them.
Does the ease of a certain gender expression make you dress that way more?
No. I don’t think about it at all. If I feel like dressing colorful, I wear leggings. I never say “Today I am going to dress more masculine. Today I am going to dress more feminine.” People make comments about it. I ask them, what makes it masculine or feminine? They say “The makeup.” I don’t think about it, but people do. Once someone said, “Wow, you are very flamboyant. Are you gay?” But other times people say, “I would never think you are gay because you don’t act like it.
Have you / did you / will you take pictures from this project and post them on places outside of this project? If so, which ones and why?
I’ll share the wildest ones--the ones that make people question and talk.
In your life, was there another time you explored/experimented with gender identity/expression? If so, what type of experience was it?
Probably more now because I am comfortable with who I am. Before I was scared, but now I am comfortable being different and wearing women’s clothes.
Are there things you would be more willing to do now after modeling for the project that you wouldn’t have done before?
I would be more willing to wear heels and makeup. Why not? It’s fun to walk in heels.
What words do you feel represent your identity?
Passionate, wild, fearless, gay, happy, friendly, social.
What parts of your identity are hidden from the photographs?
Yes. For example, my two star tattoos represent two sides of me. The empty star is the one that is sad behind closed doors. The colorful one is the side that people see, but I feel like I have to show the other one too.
What do you feel is the aspect of your identity that you think about the most? How do you feel that this part of your identity was represented and/or misrepresented in this project?
I think about how other people see me. For example, what do people think of my hair? I’m walking through New Haven, and I always get looks, and I wonder what people are thinking of me. Are they thinking “it’s another gay guy?”
Was there anything about the project that made you feel angry or uncomfortable or other negative emotions? If so, what did you feel and why?
The questions. Sometimes I don’t think about this stuff, and bringing it up makes me think that I should think about it more often.
How does your physical fitness or body weight play into your gender identity/expression?
Because I’m skinny, people think I’m more feminine, and they call me a twink. People think I am weak because I’m skinny, but then they see me lift a girl in dancing and are surprised by how strong I can be.
Do you have anything else you want to say about your experience with Gender, Projected?
Whether you want to wear heels or jeans or shorts or dress or whatever it is, I feel like doing this project allows you to be comfortable and get out there for people who haven’t seen you. It is a really good project for people to see the multiple sides of just one person. Sometimes you only see one side, but people don’t realize that there are many layers to each human. It’s not only what you see when you see them on the street or at work--there is someone else behind there.